My name is Clare and this is my journey. 

I grew up loving television and film, being obsessed with behind the scenes information and how how these movies I loved were made. It wasn't until high school that I was able to explore that with my film class. I learned a lot about the basics of filmography. Going into college I wanted to major in Cinema Studies at Willamette University, but due to family pressure I set out to major in finance.

 

After one year of college, I realized I wanted to see more of the world than what I have experienced as a student. So I lived with a family friend in Germany where I took an internship in marketing. At this firm, there was an in-house videographer but I was afraid to accept him as a mentor because the position I worked in was more applicable for business school. 

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When I came back from my gap year I enrolled at the University of San Francisco because it was such an international city. The idea was that even though I had to go to study finance, at least I could learn it in a multi-cultural environment which satisfied my love of culture and diversity. An after graduating there may be work available there in international business. 

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However, shortly after moving there, the world closed due to the Covid-19 pandemic in 2020. I continued my studies at home with my family. I was disappointed because the whole reason I transferred to USF was to live there. 

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Slowly, the world re-opened. But I did not move back to San Francisco. The world had changed and so had I. I transferred to the University of Denver because of their entrepreneurship program. Soon after studying there, a schoolwide business pitch competition was announced and the winner would get the support needed to get a startup off the ground. My father had always said the only way to be successful in this world is to own your own business, so I took this shot to finally make my family proud. I pitched an idea for an environmentally sustainable form of protein--crickets. By grinding crickets into food we could reduce reliance on the conventional meat industry which strains our resources and pollutes waterways, air, and land. And I won the competition.

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For two years I grew the startup. Winning more pitch competitions and expanding my reach, on the outside I was a major success but inside I was burning out and losing motivation. I loved my mission but I never felt fulfilled. My favorite part of the whole business endeavor was the marketing. It was a small chance to express my creativity that had been so suppressed by class subjects I didn't care about and my own business finances to maintain.

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Finally I couldn't fake it anymore and closed the business. It was such a relief, but by now the kids I graduated high school with were graduating college and I was stuck at home-- jobless and school-less. At this point I knew that my soul could not take more business school and I decided I would find a way to get a job in film, a passion that had been the only constant in my whole life. I decided that no matter who I disappoint, this was the only way to ever feel happy in my work. 

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So I took a community college film class. And an editing class. And I stated remote school at USF to finish my degree so that I could move on with my life and pursue the career path that I had always wanted. 

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Nearly a year of applying to jobs and internships later, I received a response from the Director of Creative Services at KCRA3, Larry Kellogg. This was the news channel my family and I had been watching my entire life. Even though I hadn't seen him on TV, it was like a celebrity was calling me. Long story short I took the internship and it was the experience of a lifetime. I couldn't believe that I got to go to work every day and be a part of a creative team that created content which actually aired on live tv. I needed to pinch myself every time I saw a topical that I had created appear on my television screen. And I will never forget the feeling when I saw my national ice cream day spot appear on my screen at home. It was a fairy tale. 

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Although I wanted to continue working at KCRA, there wasn't a position open for me at that time. So I was lucky enough to take a job at Fox40 as a production assistant. People think of PAs as the lowest on the totem pole in any production, but I was still so proud to hold the title. I got to film the broadcasts and watch it air in real time. When I operated the teleprompter I could hear Richard Sharp speak the words I was presenting for him. It was thrilling. Until the 3am-10am shift got the better of my epilepsy. The odd hours threw off my sleep cycle and I had a seizure right behind the camera while we were live. As much as I loved my job and the people I worked with, I had to quit. 

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Unemployed on my parents couch again, I resumed the job/internship application process. 7-ish months later I get another break. I interview for my current internship at the City of Roseville with their award-winning video production team. Every day that I go to work I feel incredibly blessed to film, edit, and broadcast. It has been further confirmation that this is all I want to do for the rest of my life.

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My internship will end in June, but I am done letting chances to work in tv pass me by. I feel that I am making up for lost time but still struggle with regrets looking at all the chances I had. That is why the Emmerson Coleman Fellowship is so important to me. This is my opportunity to lock in a career within the production and programming industry. It is all I ever want to do.